the fourth and fifth bowls. The last salvo, coloured red, will land by the last bowl. They will be launched in quick succession so that they will look like the French flag flying through the air."
A buzz of excitement went around the audience.
King Harold was giggling his head off as the first serf was launched from behind a sand dune toward the first bowl.
Weeeee plop. Right in the middle of the bowl splashing trifle over Harold and much of the crowd.
The crowd erupted into laughter; Harold was in hysterics.
The second serf was fired.
Weeeeeeeee plop. Dead centre to more roars of delight.
Weeeeeeeeeee plop. Another hit. Harold was trying hard not to wet himself.
Weeeeeeeeeeee plop. "Bravo", "well done Sir Hugh," and so on.
Weeeeeeeeeeeee plop. Harold was beginning to think this was too easy.
Weeeeeeeeeeeeeee plop. Six out of six.
"We can't have this can we?" Harold thought to himself as he sneaked out to the final bowl. Just as the seventh serf was catapulted over the dune Harold push the bowl of trifle to one side.
Weeeeeeeeaaaaaaaah! splat.
The crowd gasped as Harold jumped out from behind the bowl of trifle.
"Watch out for the red arrows!" they all yelled.
"Marvellous," he shouted back, "I've not seen them before."
Harold looked up to the sky and was instantly struck down by a red arrow.
The English, half drunk, decided that the Normans must have planned to assassinate Harold right from the start. Soon tempers were fraying, and a fight started in the crowd which soon escalated into a full scale battle.
The Normans won the battle and William became King of England. Many of the English Knights were either killed or stripped of their titles, their estates being handed over to the Norman Knights.
Sir Hugh was rewarded by being given the estate of one of the defeated English Knights in what is now Norfolk. Hugh found the English climate there much more pleasant than the French, it was never too hot and never too cold, it did rain more often but that gave him more opportunity to work on his hobby. He bought Bridget over from France and they decided to stay in England for the rest of their lives.
And so it was that the Normans arrived in England.
From the original story published on the Internet as Burdett's, the Universe and everything. Copyright © Les Burdett 11 March 1997
This story version Copyright © Les Burdett 31 December 2022
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