"Yuk," Roger muttered as wiped the kiss off on his sleeve. "Full speed ahead lads, we'll tow The Mass o' Hearties up wind, so's the rest of Red Beard's crew can't rescue him."
The pirates couldn't match The Wood Pigeons speed as the donkey drives drove the ship upwind, and they soon lost sight of The Mass o' Hearties. Two hours later Roger scanned the horizon through the hollow mast.
"Ha, ha, ha! We's lost 'em all right. Surface lads, let’s go get our prize."
Roger and his best fighting men boarded The Mass o' Hearties. There in the cage below the deck was Red Beard and a bunch of mean looking Pirates.
"Ahoy there Red Beard," Roger called down to the pirates below, "we be taking 'e back ta London, ta stand trial for murder an' piracy. But first I's gonna punish 'e for murdering my friend Cap'n Burt Sigh. Bring Red Beard back ta The Wood Pigeon lads."
"It be a fair cop Jolly Roger, 'e caught me fair an' square, ‘ave mercy on me." replied Red Beard.
"'E wants mercy does 'e? Well, we don't ‘ave any mercy, we'll give 'e Percy, the ships cat. Fifteen lashes of the cat lads, aye fifteen lashes."
The ships cat was a large nervous tom tabby. A lash of the cat was a punishment Roger often dealt out to humiliate any crew member that was found to be drunk on duty. A single lash was not too painful, and it did make everyone laugh, so the embarrassed sailor would be careful to stay sober from then on. The sailor would be tied against a mast with his bare back outwards. A long strap was tied around the rear of the cat, then it was swung around the captain’s head, which made the cat put its legs out straight with claws outstretched. The cat was then
thrown against the sailors back and it would sink its claws into the skin to try and hold on. More than a single lash meant pulling Percy back off the sailor while he still had his claws in, thus tearing the skin and causing extensive bleeding. You can try this at home if you have a cat, a strap, and a younger brother or sister.
"Ooh captain, don't you think you should punish Red Beard in front of his crew," Julian suggested.
"Aye lad, but this boat be too small. There's not enough room here to swing a cat, back to The Wood Pigeon lads."
Back on board The Wood Pigeon Red Beard was tied against a mast and the crew assembled to witness punishment.
"Ah har, Percy me ol' sea cat, 'ere Percy Percy Percy, puss puss puss. Whose tasty bit of cod is this 'ere then? Ah har, gotcha!"
A strap was tied around Percy's hind quarters and Roger started to swing the cat around his head.
Meeoooowwwwww, wooosshhh, splat, "AARRGGHH!", rrrip.
"One," Julian called the count.
Meeoooowwwwww, wooosshhh, splat, "AARRGGHH!", rrrip.
"Two."
Meeoooowwwwww, wooosshhh, splat, "AARRGGHH!", rrrip.
"Three."
"'Ave mercy on me Cap'n Roger," Red Beard cried.
"Ah har, he, he, 'ave Percy on 'e Red Beard. Ha, ha, ha."
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